Sena cilamwaalila kubandika cakukkazyika moyo angomukwetene limwi? Sena mulalibilika akaambo kakuzyiba kuti zyintu nzyomwaamba zilakonzya kupa kuti mutalike kuzwangana?

Kuti kacili boobo, amuzyibe kuti zyintu zilakonzya kuba kabotu. Pele cakusaanguna, mweelede kuzyiba cimupa kukazyanya.

Kutamvwana.

Bakaintu bajisi zyina lya Jillian * bakaamba kuti: “Zimwi ziindi ndilabaambila balumi bangu zyintu zimwi, ikutali mbuli mbondali kuyanda kuti ndaambe, alimwi zimwi ziindi inga ndilimvwa mbuli kuti ndabaambila kale makani aamwi, kakuli kuti kunyina nindabaambila, ndali kuyeeya buyo kuti ndabaambila.

Kwiindana kuyeeya.

Nokuba kuti mulamvwana kapati angomukwetene limwi, mizeezo yanu iliindene muzyintu zimwi. Ino nkaambo nzi? Nkaambo kunyina bantu bakozyenye cakumaninina—calo cikonzya kupa kuti mulukwatano mube lukkomano naa mazwanga. Bunji bwabanabukwetene, balazwangana.

Kutobela cikozyanyo cibi.

Bakaintu bazyina lya Rachel bakaamba kuti: “Bazyali bangu bakali kukazyanya akwaambana zyintu zibyaabi kapati. Aboobo ciindi nindakakwatwa, ndakali kubandika amulumaangu mbubwenya mbobakali kubandika baama abataata. Tiindakaiya mbokutondezyegwa bulemu.”

Amukazyibe kaambo.

Kanji-kanji, kukazyanya cabukali kulaletwa atwaambo twakaindi, kutali kaako nkobakazyanya aciindi eeco. Mucikozyanyo, kuzwangana ikutalisyigwa amajwi mbuli aakuti, “Lyoonse mulamuka!” ndiza inga kakutajatikizyi kubamba ciindi, pele ambweni inga kakuli umwi ulimvwa kuti teendelezyegwi kabotu.

 Kufwumbwa naa ncinzi cimupa kuzwangana, kuti kamukazyanya ciindi coonse mulakonzya kuciswa nokuba kulekana buya. Pele ino inga mwacileka buti kuzwangana?

Cikonzya kumugwasya kuti muleke kuzwangana, nkuzyiba kaambo kamupa kuzwangana. Ciindi nomukkomene, amusole kutobela nzila eezyi:

1. Umwi aumwi ulakonzya kulemba twaambo apepa twamunyemya. Mucikozyanyo, mulumi ulakonzya kulemba kuti: “Buzuba boonse mwali kwiizya abalongwe banu alimwi tiimwanditumina fooni kundaambila nkomwabede.” Mukaintu ulakonzya kulemba kuti: “Mwandinyemena akaambo kakuti ndali kuyanzana abeenzuma.”

2. Ciindi nomukkomene, amubandike twaambo tutobela: Sena ali makani aaya koomoonga? Sena cali kukonzyeka kwaaleka buyo? Zimwi ziindi, akaambo kakuyanda luumuno, inga cagwasya kuzumina kuti umwi aumwi nzyayeeya ziliindene kapati anzyayeeya mweenzinyina, mpoonya inga cabota kwaaleka buyo makani akaambo kaluyando.—Mpoijanika njiisyo eeyi mu Bbaibbele: Tusimpi 17:9.

Ikuti mwazuminana kuti kwanyina makani aapa kunyema, amulekelelane akuzumina kuti makani abambwa.—Mpoijanika njiisyo eeyi mu Bbaibbele: Bakolose 3:13, 14.

Ikuti umwi naa nyoonse mwabona kuti makani mapati, amubweze ntaamu eeyi iitobela:

3. Amulembe mbomwalimvwide ciindi nimwali kuzwangana. Mucikozyanyo, mulumi inga walemba apepa lyakwe kuti: “Ndabwene kuti mwabikkilide kapati maano kubeenzinyoko kwiinda ndime.” Awalo mukaintu inga walemba kuti: “Ndalimvwide kuti mwandeendelezya mbuli mwana musyoonto walo uulangwa-langwa abausyi.”

4. Mwamana amupane mapepa ngomwalemba kutegwa aumwi abale nzyaalemba mweenzinyina. Ino ncinzi cini camunyemya mweenzinyoko ciindi nimwali kuzwangana? Amubandike aumwi ncaali kuyandika kucita kujatikizya makani aayo kakunyina kuzwangana.—Mpoijanika njiisyo eeyi mu Bbaibbele: Tusimpi 29:11.

5. Amubandike ncomwaiya muciiyo eeci. Ino inga mwazibelesya buti eezyo nzyomwaiya kutegwa mumane mazwanga naa kulikwabilila kumazwanga aakonzya kuba?