IKIGABANE CA 4

Kubera iki papa na mama bavanye?

“Umusi papa aduta, nari i muhira ndi kumwe na mama. Nari mfise imyaka itandatu gusa, ugaca wumva ko ntatahura ivyariko biraba. Nari nicaye hasi ndiko ndaraba televiziyo. Narumva mama yiyuha iryosozi yinginga papa ngo ntagende. Papa yaramanutse ingazi afise isakoshi, arapfukama aransoma, maze ambwira ati: ‘Papa azoguma agukunda.’ Yaciye asohoka. Inyuma y’aho, haraciye igihe kirekire ntasubiye kumukubita ijisho. Kuva ubwo, nagumye mfise ubwoba yuko na mama yokwigiriye.”—Elaine, imyaka 19.

 IYO abavyeyi bahukanye, womenga isi yose ikuguyeko. Womengo ushikiwe n’icago kigusiga mu marushwa utazokwigera uvamwo. Akenshi biratuma ugira inyiyumvo zitari nke: uri isoni, ishavu, amaganya, ugutinya ko uzohava utabwa, ukwiyagiriza, akabonge, kwumva ko wabuze koko, mbere ukumva ushaka no kwihora.

Nimba abavyeyi bawe baherutse kuvana, ushobora kuba wiyumva gutyo, kandi ivyo ntibitangaje, kuko Umuremyi wacu yari yateguye ko abana barerwa n’abavyeyi babo bompi. (Abanyefeso 6:1-3) Ubu, hari umuvyeyi utakibona ku musi ku musi, uwo ushobora kuba warikundira cane. Uwitwa Daniyeli, abavyeyi biwe bakaba bavanye afise imyaka indwi, avuga ati: “Narubaha cane papa kandi sinashaka ko tuvana. Ariko mama ni we yaronse uburenganzira bwo kutugumana.”

Imvo zituma abavyeyi bavana

Akenshi, gutandukana bishika abana batari bavyiteze kubera yuko abavyeyi baba barabahishije ingorane ziri hagati yabo. Uwitwa Rasheli yari afise imyaka 15 igihe abavyeyi biwe bahukana. Avuga ati: “Naraguye mu gahundwe! Nahora ngira ngo barakundana.” Mbere n’igihe abavyeyi boba bama mu nduru, igihe bavanye abana ntibabura kwumva bakubiswe n’inkuba!

Akenshi, abavyeyi baravana bitumwe n’uko umwe yakoze ubusambanyi. Ico gihe, Imana iremerera uwahemukiwe kwahukana akagira uburenganzira bwo gusubira kwubakana n’uwundi. (Matayo 19:9) Mu bindi bihe na ho, “uburake, n’ugukankama, n’ugutukana” biravamwo ubukazi, bigatuma umwe mu bavyeyi atinyira amagara yiwe n’ay’abana.—Abanyefeso 4:31.

Tuvugishije ukuri, hari abubakanye bavana ata mvo zifashe zihari. Aho gutorera umuti ingorane zabo, hari abahukana ku mvo z’ubwikunzi bitwaje yuko ngo “ata munezero bafise” canke “batagikundana.” Ivyo ntibihimbara Imana, kuko ‘yanka ukwahukana’ mwene ukwo. (Malaki 2:16) Yezu yaravuze yuko hari imiryango yohungabanye bitumwe n’uko umwe mu bubakanye abaye umukirisu.—Matayo 10:34-36.

 Uko biri kwose, nimba abavyeyi bawe bahisemwo kwinumira canke bakaguha gusa inyishu zidatomoye ku bibazo ubabaza ku vyerekeye ukwahukana kwabo, ntibisobanura ko batagukunda. Bashobora kuba gusa batoroherwa no kukubwira ibijanye n’ukwo kwahukana kubera umubabaro bafise. (Imigani 24:10) Hari n’aho mbere kwiyemerera amakosa umwe wese yagiriye mugenziwe vyoba bibatera isoni n’ubuyega.

Ivyo wokora

Numenye ibiguhagaritse umutima. Kubera yuko ukwahukana gushobora guhindura rwose ubuzima bwawe, woshobora gusanga usigaye uhagarikwa umutima n’ibintu wahora ubona ko utobura. Naho ari ukwo, woshobora kurengera ubwoba ufise mu kubanza kumenya ivyo bintu biguhagaritse umutima ivyo ari vyo. Shira aka kamenyetso ✔ aha munsi ku kintu kikuraje ishinga kuruta ibindi, canke werekane ico wewe ubwawe wiyumvira mu kucandika imbere ya harya havuga ngo “Ikindi.”

□ Umuvyeyi nsigaranye na we nyene azonta.

□ Umuryango wacu ntuzoronka amafaranga ahagije yo kuwutunga.

□ Kuba bahukanye hari ukuntu vyamvuyeko.

□ Ninubaka urwanje, nanje bizongendera gutyo.

□ Ikindi ․․․․․

Nubabwire ibikuraje ishinga. Umwami Salomo yavuze ko hari “igihe co kuvuga.” (Umusiguzi 3:7) Gerageza rero kuraba umwanya ubereye wo kuyaga n’abavyeyi bawe ivyo bintu bikuraje ishinga uhejeje kwerekana. Bamenyeshe ukuntu ubabaye canke ukuntu wataye umutwe. Hari aho boshobora kugusigurira ibiriko biraba, bigatuma amaganya ufise agabanuka. Nimba abavyeyi bawe badashaka kuguha imfashanyo ukeneye ako kanya canke bakaba batabishoboye, woshobora kwitura umugenzi ahumuye. Niwigore umurondere. Kuronka gusa umuntu agutega ugutwi birashobora kukuruhurira rwose.—Imigani 17:17.

 Ikiruta vyose, So wawe wo mw’ijuru, umwe ‘yumva amasengesho,’ arashobora kugutega ugutwi. (Zaburi 65:2) Numubwire ibiri mu mutima wawe vyose, ‘kuko akubabara.’—1 Petero 5:7.

Ivyo utokora

Ntubike inzika. Daniyeli, umwe twavuga, agira ati: “Abavyeyi banje bari abantu biyumvira ivyabo gusa. Mu vy’ukuri, ntibigeze batwiyumvira canke ngo biyumvire ukuntu ivyo bagira vyogize ingaruka kuri twebwe.” Ivyo Daniyeli avuga birumvikana kandi vyoshobora kuba ari ukuri. Ariko none wokwishura gute ibi bibazo bikurikira? Andika inyishu zawe mu kibanza cerekanywe.

Ni ingorane iyihe yari gushikira Daniyeli iyo atikuramwo ishavu n’inzika? (Soma Imigani 29:22.) ․․․․․

Naho bitari vyoroshe, ni kubera iki Daniyeli vyari kumubera vyiza agerageje kubabarira abavyeyi biwe ku mubabaro bamuteye? (Soma Abanyefeso 4:31, 32.) ․․․․․

Ukuri kw’ishimikiro kuvugwa mu Baroma 3:23 kwari gufasha gute Daniyeli kubona neza abavyeyi biwe? ․․․․․

Niwirinde gukora ivyokugirira nabi. Uwitwa Deni avuga ati: “Inyuma y’aho abavyeyi banje bahukaniye, naragize umubabaro n’akabonge. Naratanguye kugira ingorane kw’ishure, bica bituma nsibira umwaka umwe. Inyuma y’aho . . . nabaye  umuntu akunda kugira utuntu tw’utugugu kugira ntwenze abandi mw’ishure kandi nta ntureka utansangamwo.”

Wibaza ko Deni yariko arondera gushika ku ki mu kwigira akagugu kugira atwenze abandi mw’ishure? ․․․․․

Kubera iki yatanguye kwisuka mu ntureka zose? ․․․․․

Nimba wariyumvisemwo agatima ko gukomesha abavyeyi bawe mu kwigenza nabi, ingingo ngenderwako iri mu Bagalatiya 6:7 yogufasha gute kuguma ubona ibintu mu buryo bubereye? ․․․․․

 Bizoteba bihere

Igihe umuntu akomeretse canke avunitse, birashobora gufata amayinga canke mbere amezi kugira akire neza. Ni na ko bigenda igihe umuntu akomeretse mu mutima: bifata igihe kugira akire. Abahinga bamwebamwe biyumvira yuko imvune zikomeye ziterwa n’ukwahukana zirangira mu myaka itatu. Womengo ni igihe kirekire, mugabo niwibuke yuko hari ibintu vyinshi bitegerezwa kuba imbere y’uko ubuzima bwawe busubirana.

Ico womenya co, ubuzima bwa misi yose bwo mu muryango buba bwarahungabanijwe n’ukwahukana; bica rero bisaba ko busubira gutunganywa bushasha. N’ikindi kandi, hazoca igihe kugira ngo abavyeyi bawe basubire gutekanirwa mu mutima. Aho gusa ni ho bazoshobora kuguha imfashanyo ikenewe. Ariko rero, ubuzima bwawe nibwasubirana, uzoca utangura kwumva wongeye kumera nka kera.

RABA N’AYANDI MAKURU MU GITABU CA 2, IKIGABANE CA 25

MU KIGABANE GIKURIKIRA

Woba ufise amaganya kubera umuvyeyi wawe yubakanye n’uwundi? Wovyifatamwo gute?

ICANDITSWE NYAMUKURU

“Hari . . . igihe co gukiza.”—Umusiguzi 3:2, 3.

IMPANURO

Nimba abavyeyi bawe barahukanye, umwe muri bo canke kumbure bompi barafise amakosa. Gerageza kuyamenya kugira ngo nawe ntuze uyagwemwo niwaramuka uhisemwo gushinga urwawe.—Imigani 27:12.

WARI UBIZI . . . ?

Nimba umubano w’abavyeyi bawe utarangwamwo agahimbare, si ngombwa ngo nawe bizoce bigenda gutyo.

ICO NTEGEKANYA GUKORA!

Nshobora kuyagira ibindaje ishinga (andika izina ry’umuntu ahumuye woshima kubiyagira) ․․․․․

Agatima ko gukomesha abavyeyi banje mu kwigenza nabi ninumva kanjemwo, ibi ni vyo bizomfasha kwigumya: ․․․․․

Ico noshima kubaza umuvyeyi wanje (abavyeyi banje) kuri ivyo ni ․․․․․

UVYIBAZAKO IKI?

● Kubera iki abavyeyi bawe bashobora gutinya kuyaga nawe ibijanye n’ukwahukana kwabo?

● Kubera iki bihambaye kwibuka yuko abavyeyi bawe bahukanye bitewe n’amatati ari hagati yabo, atari amatati bafitaniye nawe?

[Iciyumviro nyamukuru ku rup. 32]

Mama amaze kuduta, naragize akabonge, kandi nta musi wijana ntarize. Mugabo narasenga kenshi, nkaguma nitunira ku gufasha abandi kandi nkaguma niyegereje abagenzi bahumuye. Ndabona ko Yehova Imana yamfashije kwihangana biciye kuri ubwo buryo.’’—Natalie

[Ifoto ku rup. 33]

Gukira imvune iterwa n’ukwahukana kw’abavyeyi bimeze nko gukira imvune yo ku kuboko: birababaza, mugabo urateba ugakira